Paul's Place ūüćł
Welcome to my blog

... where you'll find an assortment of my short stories and random thoughts. My mood changes - from time to time.

There's a gentle breeze blowing in from the lake , and it's soothing my soul. I'm watching the sail boats as they flutter and dot the horizon, and the waves are lapping gently, up against the rocks. My cooler is full of frozen jello-vodka slushies ; so have a seat, grab a slushie . . . and I'll share a story with you.

I welcome all your comments and messages.
If you're entertained - Watch My Blog. and share a few smiles with me .

My --- > 'FEATURED FAVORITE' <---- blog post for this week is: 'Helpless At The Gyno ' - an erotic and hot (short, 2 part) tale of what happens to a woman, when she meets her new Gynecologist. Click the blue title below . . .
- Helpless at the Gyno part 1 based on a true story  -
* Words are like meatloaf - they can be sculpted into any shape you choose. . . . . (* ©April - September 2018 Paul P. )
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My Private Mail Box
Posted:Jul 12, 2018 9:41 am
Last Updated:Sep 16, 2018 9:24 pm
My Private Mail Box allows us to communicate, in uninterrupted privacy . 'Click' - ' Comments' , and leave me a message. You can read my response from your own Blog Main Page - 'Where I am Quoted' , or check back here , as I always reply within one day. Only you and I can see what's being said. 'Pending' - means it's PRIVATE.

0 Comments , 43 Pending
Women, Men, And Pool Play !
Posted:Sep 19, 2018 12:00 am
Last Updated:Sep 19, 2018 11:20 am
When I was much younger, and I would go to late night bars and clubs in downtown Montreal, I found myself (on one occasion) , having to go for a pee. I briskly walked into the washroom and chose the only urinal available - right next to the sink. I didn't know it at the time, but it was a 'co-ed bathroom' .

I figured THAT out, when a young woman (my age), walked out of the stall and began washing her hands, in the sink - right NEXT to me. She also thought, it might be a good idea to have a conversation, so she turned to me (while I had my hands full ), and proceeded to eloquently, express her admiration and jealousy for the fact that; men could pee standing up. She might have previously enjoyed a drink or two - I'm not sure. At that point, I had a rather hard time, concentrating on what I was supposed to be doing there. She glanced down at me (a no-no in urinal protocol), smiled shyly, and walked out.

Later, I introduced myself to her. I clearly recall - her name was Chantal. I found out, (amongst other things), that she worked as an 'hair dresser ', and she had a brother, living in Greece.
CAN women pee standing up? Of course they can !
SHOULD they pee standing up?
It depends on WHERE they are !

Here is ONE example where women might pee standing up.

Statistics show that 19 % of men and women admit to peeing at least once, in a pool. Olympic swimmers (including Michael Phelps) even admit to it. In fact, in an average 210,000 gal. pool, over 20 gal. of pee was measured. That pee ratio goes up, even higher, in hot tubs.
Do you guys and girls ever visit pools or hot tubs... and think about WHAT , you're swimming in?

Do ... you women, pee standing up? (And you know where, you can do that - right?)

19 % of all of us probably, even... ughhhh... omg ... never mind. How could we ? (lol)

What about all those fish and dolphins and whales doing 'everything' - in those lakes and rivers and oceans...

Do You Prefer Penises or Pussies ?
Posted:Sep 17, 2018 11:50 pm
Last Updated:Sep 19, 2018 5:15 am
I was reflecting about things , this early morning, as I looked around 'blogsville' , and 'erotic stories' and 'magazine', and the 'chat rooms', and 'live vids', and generally perusing the infrasphere that is this A F F messed up ' cluster fuck' , bug filled website, and I thought ; rather than busting my balls writing something marginally witty, or humorous or erotic (such a waste of three syllable words and perfect punctuation) - why wouldn't I just ask a simple question ?

So. . .
What are you guys doing to amuse yourselves today and what do you think about travel?

Amongst other things , I'm off to the Passport Office, to get a renewal form. My passport expired 5 years ago . My daughters travel more than I do. Wow ! I don't like to travel, but only because , I hate crowds of people. If I won the $200 M Lotto, I would go to Egypt to see the Pyramids, and pay $1,000,000 to the 20,000 people that had bought tickets that day - just so they would stay the fuck away, and I'd have the place to myself !

(P.S. No pics of penises or pussies here. . it was just a 'teaser' title . . . whatever. Message me on my blog Mail box - I'll send you one. )

This is a pic of that marina I like to hang out at. The slushies are in my cooler - behind me. Uhh ... yep.
The Perfect Tease ... or ... What did I Really Do In August? 44
Posted:Sep 14, 2018 6:04 am
Last Updated:Sep 17, 2018 3:10 pm
What did I really do in August? Well... here is how I spent one day.

It was a beautiful, calm and peaceful, late August evening. I was the only one parked there, at one of my 'usual' spots at the marina, enjoying the setting sun and watching a very small flotilla of sail boats, as they lay sprinkled, on the lake horizon. In the far distance a powerful jet ski 'screamed', across the mirrored water, toward the shore. In brief seconds - it had arrived !

A handsome, tanned young man and an athletic, stunning, and equally tanned woman, (both perhaps, in their late twenties or early thirties ) were sitting with youthful confidence, on that purple and white 'water beast'. It flew in at full throttle towards the landing ramp, to the right of me, sprayed a wall of foamed water, twenty feet into the air, roared to a stop and then... drifted toward shore. He turned off the sound system, which had been thundering. Silence... reined again... on that tiny... peaceful... inlet dock. A small plume of bluish, white exhaust fumes , filled the air and moved leisurely... towards me. I coughed.

The massive, sport jet ski, soundlessly floated inland, those last few feet. With precisioned execution, he was first to jump off the machine, wade into the water and stride toward the parking lot, to his left. She then (toes pointed), gently stepped into the knee deep water and grabbed hold of the tow line at the bow.

"Babe... I'll be back in five.", he called back to her.

Hands on her hips - she waited for her 'man'. Her long fingers and red painted nails, combed through her wind tussled, dirty blond hair, as she flipped her sun glasses up, to perch securely, on the top of her head.

Her 'man', soon reappeared and slowly backed up his trailer, which was hitched to the large, black, flat-bed, four door pickup truck he drove. The extra large chrome rimmed wheels, eased down the ramp and into the water.

"Babe... Throw me the line please."

She quickly threw him the tow line and he effortlessly pulled their craft out of the water and onto the trailer. His lanky muscled body, moved swiftly as he secured their machine to the motorized winch, while it buzzed to attention. The only interested witnesses watching all of this - were three dockside seagulls, a pair of floating ducks, and me.

She greeted his success with a languid kiss to his lips, as she clasped his face with her hands. He in turn, grabbed her bare, slim waist with both hands, drew her closer and kissed her with equal passion.

She stood by, while he moved his truck, up and out of the launch ramp ... turned right and stopped directly behind my car - not 10 or 12 feet away. He continued to secure their craft tightly and firmly, with nylon cords, as water dripped off the trailer.

"I am going to dry off.", she announced to him.

I had been standing by my car, near my open trunk. I reached into the ice filled cooler, for a chilled bottle of water and popped the cap. She never glanced at me as she walked to the rear passenger side of the truck, and opened the door. I could see that the black leather seats were littered with bags and clothes and towels.

Feeling rather self conscious and very much like an intruder in her space, I walked back to my front seat, sat down, and sipped my water. I turned my head towards my rear view mirror and continued to watch her with curiosity.

I noticed that she wore a skimpy red bikini that seemed painted on her body. She climbed up into the back seat and, unable to stand upright - crouched there, bent at the waist, at a 90 degree angle, while that back door - lay open. My view included the spectacle of her perfect bum and that exquisitely shaped triangle, between her legs. That truck door - still remained open.

She then, poked her thumbs into the sides of her bikini and much to my shock - slowly (and I mean... very slowly), peeled away the only cloth, protecting her modesty. Inch by inch she leisurely lowered her bikini and finally (as it sprung free, away from the grasp of her tight bum and thighs), revealed a perfectly, puckered pussy. I was stunned... and embarrassed for her - but I continued to look. Did she know that she was directly in back of me?

She was shaved bare, and her cute pink vagina, was a sight. As if on cue, a seagull flew by my open window and squawked - perhaps at me... in disapproval ? She then grabbed a towel and gently, and carefully, dried her bum and her legs and her toes and her 'woman parts' with lingering patience and diligence. Sliding her towel between and into her pussy, she made sure she was dry.

Should I have given a shit that she was twenty something? Should I have ventured out of my car and closed that truck door for her? She WAS, much younger than me, but I was suspicious ; 'Perhaps she was fucking with me?' I looked at my side mirror and smiled when I read - 'OBJECTS IN MIRROR ARE CLOSER THAN THEY APPEAR'.

Not quite finished, she leaned further into the cab to reach for something, trapped on the other side of the seat. I tried not to look, but I was now a prisoner of my own arousal. My view of her was explicitly expanded to include a perfect view of her pink little bum hole. As well as of that dark mysterious vacuum between those gently parting lips of her vagina, as it grew wider and darker. She continued to bend over in that back seat. Her bum wiggled from side to side while her pussy blinked at me incessantly - begging me perhaps, to walk over and help? At that point, I realized that I was either an unintentional voyeur or perhaps - an intentional 'one' , in her little 'game' !

She eventually unfurled a flowing, flower printed sun dress and slowly, leg by leg, stepped into it and pulled it up her thighs and over her butt. She gingerly tiptoed backwards out of the truck, stepped out and onto the parking lot, and turned around to reveal two, very perky and perfectly 'handful sized', plump round breasts. She leisurely, grasped the shoulders of the dress and slid them up and over her small brown nipples, adjusting the fit with both her hands. She was finally, fully clothed.

At that moment her 'man' caught up to her and clasped his hands on her ass, pulled her towards him, and kissed her.

"You look hot babe ! ", he gasped to her.

She returned his kiss with equal lust and fervor as she eagerly grabbed his cock through his shorts. He laughed, pulled her hands away, let her go and walked to the driver's side of the truck, where he opened the door and sat down. She pushed the back door of the truck shut, and opened the front passenger door.

I decided to step out of my car. I wanted a much colder, bottle of water and I needed to stretch - uhhh... my legs. She climbed into the front seat and closed the door. The diesel truck rumbled to life as she lowered her tinted window. I stood there watching.

Then, seconds before the truck inched away - she turned to her right, looked at me squarely in the eyes, smiled slyly and winked. Before I could even react - she had lowered her sunglasses over her eyes and turned her gaze forward.

The truck, and the jet ski and THAT girl - slowly eased down the tree lined road and out of the marina. I quickly popped the cap of that ice cold bottle of water and took a sip. 'Hmmmm... That was a really nice truck ! ' I thought. 'Ummm... Yep... Really nice !'

I shook my head, took another sip of water, and looked out at the lake. A seagull flew overhead, screeching ... at me?

©September 2018 Paul P.
Have you ever teased someone who you knew, was watching you ... and what did you do?

What should I have done, instead of playing her game ?

. Submitted to the September Virtual Symposium - Under the topic : #44 'What did I really do in August.
Virtual Symposium Group
The Porcelain Doll
Posted:Sep 6, 2018 4:26 am
Last Updated:Sep 15, 2018 7:28 pm
Occasionally, we formulate an image of a person, and who we THINK they are. However, regardless of how people look or act, on the surface, you'll frequently have to peel away layers of veneer to find out the secrets they keep and who they REALLY are. That's often a difficult task, and sometimes - it's best, to just let people be... or is it?

From the moment he first noticed her, he had been mesmerized by her stunning beauty and could only imagine that she also possessed, a kind, and loving soul to match. Although she resembled a porcelain doll (with short blond hair and stunning blue eyes), her skin, would have been warm to his touch - had he been close enough to caress her. She was, he concluded, unlike any other woman he had ever - (almost) met. He closed his eyes tightly, and finally, imagined that he had mustered up enough courage to approach her and say hello.

As he neared her 'space', he inhaled her perfumed scent and it filled his nostrils with a desire, for long walks along a sandy ocean beach.

"Hi. I see you here all the time. My name is Paul, and what's yours? "

She looked at him and blankly stared. Then, inexplicably, as he stood there in front of her, she seethed into a furious, roaring rage - he could not believe, was ever possible. Her screams filled the air as she closed her eyes, and clenched her fists and pounded her thighs with all her might. His ashen face reflected his shock and horror and it was so astounding and overwhelming - it was truly a nightmare ! Certainly this could not be the woman, he thought he would one day, love and adore, and spend the rest of his life with. How could she be?

Suddenly, he felt a strong hand squeezing his shoulder.

"Hey Paul... Paul ! They called your name. That's you, right?", his friend Mike jokingly yelled into his ear above the morning din of that crowded coffee shop. Paul opened his eyes, and blinked, and then blinked again. His 'Porcelain Doll' , stood some twenty feet away, laughing and smiling and talking with friends.

"Hey... buddy... what's wrong? You look like you're in a daze and you've seen a ghost ! S.nap out of it. Go get your coffee. ", he laughed heartily again, as he pushed him forward, towards the counter.

"Paul... Mr. Paul ! One Large, Triple, Venti, Half Sweet,  Non-Fat,  Caramel Macchiato !" , chimed the tall girl behind the counter, as if to the syncopated beat of a song.

He rushed up and grabbed the large cup from the girl's hand, smiled meekly and turned around. They had messed up his order, once again. He had ordered, a ' Small, Double, Double ', but he didn't care ! He was getting out of there, in a hurry.

"Hey Mike... I'll wait for you by the car, OK?", he waved to his friend.

And with that, he turned and gingerly, tried to weave his way through that tightly packed mob, and out of the shop. He lowered his head so as to assure himself, there would not be any, eye contact with his 'Porcelain Doll' . In spite of his calculations, all other lanes of passage were soon blocked, and he came dangerously close to her, until...

"Ooops." she giggled, while she steadied his arm, as it gently nudged up against her blouse and her plump left breast.

"You're in a rush this morning? I see you here all the time. My name is Debra, and what's yours?", she smiled brightly, flashing white teeth that blinded him momentarily.

"Oh... Hi... Yeah... My name is Paul. I am late for a meeting. Gotta run."

He lifted his elbow up from her breast, turned and quickly ran out the door and to the car. Finally, he leaned back against the car door, relieved that he had escaped. He wasn't sure if he should share that coffee shop 'waking nightmare' , with his psychiatrist - or not. He'd think about it. Much calmer now and away from that frantic caffeine boutique, he slowly exhaled and took a leisurely sip of his large drink.

'Oh my gosh!' , he thought to himself, while glaring at his cup. 'This stuff tastes like crap. Who drinks this shit?'

And at that moment, Mike sauntered up to him - car keys jiggling in his hand, sipping his coffee.

"They fricken messed up my order, again dammit ! Hey Paul... Whatsay we give that other coffee place... down the street, a shot tomorrow ... huh?"

Paul looked at Mike, and then back to his own drink.

"Ya know Mike? Let's give these guys one more try. Maybe tomorrow, they'll get it right.", he laughed.

Paul smiled to himself thinking ; 'Maybe tomorrow, he would get it right...! Yep... Maybe tomorrow.'

©September 2018 Paul P.
What's your beverage or food of choice to start your day?
What do you order when you go to those coffee/ specialty places?

Share your stories. Perhaps you've met, or had your eye on someone at one of those places?

Happy National Coffee Ice Cream Day!
No Regrets
Posted:Sep 3, 2018 12:48 pm
Last Updated:Sep 15, 2018 7:30 pm
Never post on FB (or for that matter) , text or email or Twitter anyone, your opinions or comments about anything, when you are angry, upset and most especially - when you've been drinking... NEVER! That includes messages to recipients such as, your 'Significant EX', or ex boyfriend or girlfriend or landlord or the Condo Administrators, or 'Celebs', or that radio or television station - and that list goes on... and on... and on. Just don't do it! Pause and wait for a day. This is just a safety tip we can all relate to - right? How many times have you strayed from that rule, read what you wrote the previous day or night, and then froze in sheer panic, terror, and horror? Oh... My... Gosh...! There is just no way to take those words back!

ANOTHER good tip would be to check and double check and then TRIPLE CHECK , what you're doing, when you send - email, or text or 'chat' ATTACHMENTS. I had a job interview recently. I should have heeded these words last week - prior to my interview ...


So... my buddy Mike, called me up and gave me the heads-up, on a new job opportunity, in the company he works for. It was for a 'Web Content/Social Media Director/Marketing Content Provider', which (roughly translated), meant - 'creative writer of a bunch of stuff'. It sounded like it was right up my alley. I'd held similar positons in the past, so I thought - 'Sure, let's go for it!'.

I submitted my CV via the corporate website and in less than a day, Melanie, from 'HR' , called me up and we set up an interview for the following day, in the late afternoon.

Melanie (an attractive, blond haired , curvy woman in her mid to late 40's), greeted me as I walked into her office. The interview (although surprisingly thorough) , went as well as I expected, so when she asked me if I had any sample writing to provide, I pulled out a vanilla folder with a printed copy of four examples of blogs and stories that I had written.

Melanie looked at me and immediately spoke .

"Actually, if you could, send them to me via an email attachment, that would be better, since there will be more than a few people reading it and some, are off site.", she said smiling.

"No worries." I quickly replied. "In fact... I can send them to you from your lobby before I leave. You'll have them in a few minutes."

"Great! The sooner the better! I look forward to receiving them. ", she replied as she stood up. We both smiled warmly and with a firm handshake, I exited her office.

I looked at my watch. The interview had taken longer than expected. I had planned to pick up my daughter from her office and go out for dinner.

'Damm...! ' I thought to myself. ' I am going to be late.'

I sat in the arm chair of the lobby, pulled out my cell phone and started rummaging through the folders that contained my written words. I then noticed that the 'Data Icon' on my phone was not lit - no service! The lobby had Wi-Fi but I needed a password. I approached the lobby receptionist however there were several other people ahead of me. I waited as patently as I could while glancing furtively at my watch, repeatedly - hoping somehow, time would stand still. The password was - 'Hello'. 'Really... ?', I thought to myself.

Finally, sitting back down in that chair, I fumbled around trying to find my blogs and stories. Eventually ... success. I quickly composed the email, hurriedly attached four various stories and blog posts, pressed 'enter' and waited until the message 'completed', appeared on my phone. I then headed out to pick up my daughter.

'I might still make it.', I thought.

I actually arrived slightly ahead of schedule and so I waited for my daughter in the parking lot of the company she works for. Quite pleased with myself (all things considered), I opened up the email that I had sent - just to be sure all had gone well... and it had. However... to my horror... I noticed that I had accidentally included one of my 'erotic stories' (from an adult sex site named... (yep) - A F F), amongst those that I had attached. It was a story called - 'Lust Amongst the Pines'. All of the color drained from my face; I was white. Mind you, it's a well crafted, lusciously descriptive and erotic story that's well paced and humorous - but it's NOT appropriate as a sample for a business review of my writing skills. I clasped my head in my hands and thought, 'Oh well.' I was disappointed in myself not to mention, more than slightly embarrassed.

Early the next morning I received a phone call from Melanie in 'HR'.

"Paul?", she began. "Melanie here. I just wanted to say that we've read your content and we'd like you to meet with our 'Principals' . Can you come by this afternoon?"

I was in shock. 'They are calling me back? Wow!', I thought to myself.

"Uhhh... Sure... This afternoon is fine. Yes. I'll be there. ", I couldn't believe it.

Melanie greeted me in her office, prior to introducing me to the 'Principles', of the company, however her demeanor had changed. As I sat down in the chair in front of her she smiled coyly and began.

" Your stories and blogs are very well written. Especially that one where that couple is caught making love in the forest by those hikers. So descriptive and real. I thought I was there.", she smiled and grinned from ear to ear.

I must have turned several shades of red before I stammered a reply.

" Well, I hadn't intended to send THAT one. It got in there by mistake and... "

" I figured that much. ", she interrupted me. "That's why I deleted it from the email, prior to sending it along to the others. It's really quite good though. Then again, I've read all your material before. " she continued.

At this point I was speechless." Ummm... really? I don't know how you could have read anything of mine before?", I replied, stammering.

" Well, aren't you posting to that adult site? Your blog is really well written! Yes... well anyway... when I read it, I realized that you might have made a mistake.", she continued. The twinkle in her eyes caught my attention.

I wanted to ask her a question. I wanted to know what her 'user profile name', was. I wanted to ask her quite a few things. I never got the chance.

" Let's introduce you to the others, shall we?", she said as she stood up. "I'll be looking forward to your next blog post." she whispered to me in a playful and hushed tone.

I am not sure if I'll get this job. Thank goodness for Melanie's intervention, and yet my curiosity about her has me more than intrigued - as she anonymously 'pervs' me ! Perhaps there will be a third interview? Melanie (not her real name by the way), if you're reading this - Yo girl ... message me... Lol...

©September 2018 Paul P.

What is your most embarrassing or worst social media horror story?
Have you ever pressed' enter ', and then regretted it?

Please share your stories and thoughts. This should be fun !

Happy Labor Day to all !

Here's a link to the story that I submitted by mistake to Melanie... Lust Amongst the Pines based on a true story
Accidentally In Love
Posted:Aug 23, 2018 10:17 am
Last Updated:Sep 15, 2018 7:59 pm
(... WARNING.. If you're not into emotional, short stories - don't read this one ...)

It was miserably cold, windy and snowy and just an abominable spring day in Montreal. His bulky, calf high snow boots, pulled him forward as he trudged along that slushy path through the park, and toward that bench. The wool tuque he wore was firmly drawn over his ears, with barely a tuft of his grey hair poking through. His puffy winter coat was zipped up to its highest points and his pockets were filled with his partially frozen hands. The gloves he wore, were not doing the job they were intended for. The frosted glasses perched on his nose, were brushed with sleet and he hunched his shoulders lower, as he approached 'his' bench.

When he arrived, he was surprised to find someone sitting there - an older woman, perhaps his age and much like himself, she was bundled, up to her eyes.

She looked at him as he slowed his progress and politely, she moved to the far end of that wooden bench. He nodded to her, sat down and tried to straighten his posture, up against the backrest. She nodded towards him , remained quiet, then turned, and gazed straight ahead. They both hunkered there in silence (neither saying a word) , watching the snow fall and listening to the distant din of city traffic, the erie echo of far away car horns, and a wailing police siren. Periodically, a car would hurtle it's way along the road in front of them, and past that large, old maple tree, and then curve its way round the bend. Neither bench partner looked at the other.

Then, as if choreographed, they both stood up at the same time, and slowly and apprehensively headed along that path - in the same direction. They looked at each other and smiled meekly.

"It's miserable weather, isn't it?", he declared shyly.

"It's our typical spring here, right?, she acknowledged. Then - she quickly added, while pointing with a mitted hand ; " There is a coffee shop along that road there, would you like to join me for a coffee? I think we could both use one. "

He looked at her, and agreed. "You're right about that. I'd love one! "

One year later ( to the day), and coincidentally - the weather hadn't changed from the previous spring. However, this time, they both walked up that path in the park - together . Her hands were firmly locked around his arm and he gently clasped them, in his.

Before long, they found 'their' bench and sat down. She leaned her head against his chest as his arms grasped her far shoulder, pulled her close and shielded her against the blowing wind and snow. Soon however, tears welled up in her eyes, as she looked up into his. She inhaled deeply, choked back a sob and sighed. He looked down at her and lovingly, tenderly, kissed her. Tears spilled down his cheeks, as he closed both his eyes. One year ago, they first met and had fallen in love. They had rarely felt such happiness in their lives. As a consequence of that accidental meeting, they had managed to repair their broken hearts and had finally found a partner with whom, they could share the love they had to offer. Love they had bottled up and thought, was lost forever.

Fourteen ago on this day, her teenaged son, and his teenaged daughter, were killed on that road, right there - just by that maple tree - when their cars accidentally collided together.

Snow and tears blinded them both, as they hugged each other steadfastly. Only the sound of snowflakes falling, filled the air around that park bench. They held each other tighter than one might think possible - tighter than you could believe... afraid to let go !

©August 2018 Paul P.

Have you ever lost someone in your life? How did you deal with it?

Tell me about that special person.

August 30 is National Grief Awareness Day !

A big hug to anyone who has lost someone. May the memories of that person live in eternity!

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Sex With An Alien
Posted:Aug 16, 2018 4:56 am
Last Updated:Sep 15, 2018 7:37 pm
Don't you find that there aren't enough jokes or laughter in our every day lives ? So much drama and angst with everyone taking themselves and others so seriously.

Today is that one day in the year to make up for it by celebrating 'National Tell A Joke Day' . Don't feel comfortable with telling a joke? Start off with a few 'one liners' or a 'knock knock' joke. From morning till night, let's laugh! Laughter has been proven to extend your life and provide a better quality of life. Try it out today and every day and see if you won't become a happier person and as a consequence, make all those around you happier as well !
... this husband and wife are abducted by Martians, get stripped and then get huddled into separate rooms. The wife meets the naked male Martian, but she's obviously not impressed.
"It's too small", she chirps.
The male Martian taps his forehead three times and his tiny one inch penis grows to over 9 inches in length. The wife grins.
"But it's too narrow", she complains and frowns again.
The male Martian, gently tugs on his ears three times and his eedee beedee penis grows to over 8 inches in girth. The wife looks lustfully at the Martian's member.

Several hours later, the husband and wife are safely transported back to their home. The wife is exhausted and beams with a languid, satisfied and breathless smile.

"Well... that was something special ! ", she gasps, grinning ... still out of breath and quite spent. "How did it go for you?"

"Awful ! Just terrible ! ", her husband replies . "I have such a splitting headache. That female Martian just kept smacking my fucking forehead and yanking on my damm ears."


Let's hear your best jokes and let's have a smiley day!
Sex and Fish in the Office
Posted:Aug 14, 2018 2:34 am
Last Updated:Sep 15, 2018 7:32 pm
Many of today's business offices are choked with so much paranoid and excessive 'political correctness', that you are likely to get reprimanded simply for scratching your groin or passing gas, let alone for making a veiled sexualy innapropriate reference or innuendo. Thankfully, there are still some offices that didn't get the 'memo' and maintain a more open, relaxed and playful ambiance .

The conversation that afternoon, in the office kitchenette, drifted towards sex. Bob, the twenty something stud, opened the discussion by bragging about his 'hot' , weekend. Evidently he had serviced his new 'love' , endlessly and repeatedly, to multiple orgasms. He had supposedly lost count of how many orgasms he'd had - but he clearly remembered that it was more than four.

Betty, (the stalky, short haired, mother of three), who was sitting next to me , got up from her chair at my table, and went to check on the fish stew, that she had been reheating in the microwave, for the last eight minutes. Steve, (recently separated), tugged at his tie and brushed his grey hair back through his fingers, and, reluctantly, dug into his cheese sandwich. Mayonnaise , oozed from the bread at the top, and it looked like there might have been a piece of lettuce sticking out from the side. Sally, who was in the seat in front of me, quickly stopped eating her spinach salad, snapped the lid back on her container, wiped her fork with her napkin, and excused herself so that she could finish some report that was, supposedly 'way past due' .

Mike and Linda and Debbie (a trio in their thirties), were sipping coffee (leisurely dripped - from our one cup, 'Designer Coffee Machine') , and joined the conversation.

Betty's fish stew was done and steaming, and it was almost as if we were all eating it with her - although it was only a simple portion, prepared for no more than three or four people, or five at the very most.

We all agreed that women past the age of forty or fifty, undoubtedly, have the advantage over most men of a similar age, when it comes to sexuality. Whereas many men are preoccupied with - performance anxiety issues, erection endurance fear, and overall concerns about stamina, women are more preoccupied with 'vaginal tensile strength' , 'tummy plumpiness' , and gravity issues, with respect to 'breast perkiness and overall sagginess'. The men in the room, scoffed at those concerns and sanctioned any and all warm and wet vaginas, in spite of anything else happening to a woman's body. Bob was especially adamant, and descriptive in his praise of those pink, languid vestibules of lust. Linda listened intently and fidgeted in her seat - crossing and uncrossing her legs. I smiled at her and she blushed.

We also acknowledged (in between our mouthfuls of nourishment and sips of coffee) , that frequency of orgasm, and post orgasmic recovery time, was an issue with most men, and yet surprisingly, not a concern at all, for the multi orgasmic, 'ready in five minutes' , women in our midst. The women in the room also claimed, quite emphatically, and with much sympathy and empathy, that they could live with a 'reasonable' delay from their partners. Betty had her mouth full and had nothing to say.

Someone (perhaps Linda), asked me for my opinion on a related topic - premature ejaculation. The tiny crew in that kitchenette , paused, and waited for my comments. Except again for Betty who was digging her fingers into her mouth, trying to pry out a fish bone, that was stuck between her back teeth.

I began... "I can have an orgasm as quickly or as slowly as I wish. Unquestionably , if I am driving alone and stopped at a red light, then I am talking about a mere minute or so. In the bedroom or wherever my girlfriend and I happen to be - I will take as much time as I want. Of course the exception, is when I am at the bowling alley with my girlfriend, on the weekends - that can take all night and sometimes forever ."

We were all surprised when we heard Betty, clear her throat and ask; " Why is that Paul? Why does it take you forever to 'cum' at that Bowling Alley when you are with your girlfriend on the weekends?"

I looked at her and replied , "Because that's my weekend part time job and every 20 or 30 seconds or so, I have to run to one of those stupid lanes and reset the fucking pins!"

Betty raised and lowered her head knowingly, and compassionately smiled at me. Steve, with his mouth quite full with a half chewed cheese sandwich mumbled ;

"Sure! Yeah . . .That makes sense."

The others plainly nodded in agreement, first to each other and then to me. Just at that moment, Richard (or Dick - as we all called him), the 'Interim VP Marketing' , gingerly walked into the room, looked around, and timidly mentioned that the meeting scheduled for 3 o'clock, had been bumped up to 2:30.

We all looked at him and fell silent. I packed up my half eaten, meat loaf sandwich and the rest of the group, bundled their food remnants as well . All except for Betty - she was eagerly munching on her fish stew. We waved and left her there and she smiled and waved back. She worked in 'Payables'.

©August 2018 Paul P.
Do you ever get into discussions about sex at work?
How does that turn out?

What do you think about fish stew (or any other smelly food), at the work place?

Anything I've missed? Feel free to freelance... I'd love to hear your point of view.

Hey y'all... don't be shy...!

He Craved Her Gentle Touch...
Posted:Aug 7, 2018 6:33 am
Last Updated:Sep 15, 2018 8:02 pm
I don't write a 'Regular Blog'. I post, 'easy reading' , simple, erotic stories. However, what if, I were to share deeper personal thoughts and ramblings, about random themes with you? What would my blog resemble?

It's been almost 4 months now since I got on 'A F F' , chose my user name, and pressed 'enter' . I had no idea what I was doing. I was intrigued, as this site just seemed to 'smell' of the thick scent of musky sex - sort of like what your bedroom might smell like, the morning after , while your lover still slept, next to you. It looked alluring and risky and some people walked around naked and that was exciting and cool.

I started this blog, posted stories, and I began 'watching' other bloggers. I noticed that although some blogs may have seemed simple enough on the surface, many bloggers shared subtle, intimate details of their lives, including the heartbreak and sadness that they'd suffered, and broken promises they'd endured. Others shared concerns they had, about where their lives were heading, and about their jobs and their families.

Regardless of what they wrote about, they all shared their thoughts and musings with this huge, curmudgeon data base of naked and half naked 'friends' and 'watchers', for one reason ; they wanted to touch them, and they wanted to be touched , by the right people, of course!

Today , I accidentally stumbled upon a blog post, from 2013. The blogger, a woman in her early 50's, had been diagnosed with level four, terminal bone cancer. All treatment had been abandoned and she was waiting. I read her very... last.. post , where she spoke of never getting the chance to watch her two daughters graduate, or get married or to see her grand children. She explained, how sad it was that she was leaving this earth, before her parents. She spoke about her life and how it was ending too soon. I was compelled to read her other previous posts. I wanted to get to know this person. I could barely see anything, as tears blurred my vision and emotions choked my throat as I thought of my own, two daughters. She was a real person, her name was Debbie , and she died in 2013.

This site is full of 'real' people, and if you spend enough time reading someone's blog, you'll probably discover something deeply personal about that blogger. It's smeared on their hearts and souls, like that stain you just can't remove, and it surfaces in the words they write - whether they realize it or not!

I might one day, be one of those people who feel open and comfortable enough to be able to share something worthy, and personal with you. Instead.... for now... I'll be the guy by the lake, sipping those frivolous frozen Jello vodka slushies , with an empty, welcoming chair, next to him, stringing and shaping random words together, and I'll be pretending that this is just a 'sex hookup site' . Perhaps that's all this site is - but today , as I reflect, it seems more than that.

I'll probably title this blog in a suitably misleading fashion and include a random naked picture of some sort, because, I am shallow and I'd like a few 'views' on this blog post ... Yep...

Do you think this site is more than a trivial sex hook up sex site?

What about your own blog... Do you share your personal thoughts or do you keep it trivial and more impersonal ?

Please share your thoughts.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Lust Amongst the Pines - (based on a true story)
Posted:Aug 2, 2018 1:46 pm
Last Updated:Sep 15, 2018 8:20 pm
What happens on a steamy August day, when two lovers and their lust for each other, converge in a thick pine forest? Well . . . .they don't play chess!

I waited for Lynn. . . I was wearing my swim trunks, towel in my hand, and flip flops on my feet as I stood under the shade of a large pine tree. Raising the ball cap I wore, I wiped the sweat off my forehead . The air was thick and hot and muggy and so typical of an afternoon in August. Cicadas took turns from all sides, as they relentlessly, unceasingly, buzzed.. Lynn and I were spending the weekend at my summer cottage and we were headed to the river to cool off. I'd been standing and waiting, for more than a few minutes now - and was growing more and more, impatient. A mosquito had just landed on my thigh - I smacked it!

"Lynn, are you ready yet? Come on! Let's go !"

And as I said that, she bounced out of the house (screen door slamming behind her) and ran up to me.

"Ok. I am ready."

With a quick kiss to my lips, she turned and started to walk towards the road. I stared at her bikini clad bum, as it wiggled from side to side. Quickly, I ran and caught up to her and pinched her butt.

"Hey...! ", she jumped and laughed.

"I know a short cut, through the forest. Let's take it. ", I said.

It wasn't long before we were under the shade of the thick pine forest, walking on a soft bed of needles. Without warning, Lynn abruptly stopped and turned around towards m e and with those twinkly blue green eyes and that mischievous look she often got - and blurted out;

"Let's make love! "

"What - here?"

"It'll be hot. ", she replied as she pressed her almost naked body against mine, put her arms around my neck and seduced m e with her patented wet, lustful kiss. She tasted great! My swim trunks were down around my ankles and I spread my towel over the pine needles in seconds.

"My my... Aren't we in a rush?" , she laughed as she looked at my already growing, chubby friend.

Lynn and I were always horny, but this hot weather seemed to have put a super heater to our lust and took it to the next level. Lynn ripped off her bikini and threw it to the side , where it landed on a fern. I barely had the time to admire her perky breasts or her sleek naked body before she lunged for me and my now, rock hard cock. She wrapped her hands around my shaft and over the head of my penis and tickled my balls with her long nails. I was already dripping wet. She kissed me and then left my lips , looked down at my cock and smiled admiringly. My hands caressed the nape of her back and then my fingers gently fluttered up and over her breasts and erect nipples, while my other hand slipped between her legs and along her swollen clit and into her pussy. She was soaking wet and I knew, neither of us was in the mood for any foreplay. The forest air was dense and humid and sweat was pooling in tiny droplets on my forehead. This was going to be a - 'hot, sticky, sexy, quicky' - for sure! Lynn got on my beach towel on her knees, pointed her ass and her cute wet vagina in the air, and lovingly beckoned me with her sultry, hushed toned, invitation.

"Come to me Paul. Come here baby!"

I could have cum right then and there, just by the way Lynn spoke those words. I quickly knelt down, and grasped her waist. In our horny, excited state of minds, we knew it wouldn't take much, to put us over the top. So when I gently pushed the wet swollen head of my cock, past her pussy lips and into and along the walls of her steamy vagina - we both let out loud gasps of pleasure and closed our eyes. 'My gosh, that first plunge just takes your breath away.', I realized. I was so deep inside Lynn, that I could feel her cervix. My body was already tingling, from head to toe. I knew Lynn was feeling similar ecstasy when she arched her back, clutched the towel with both hands and pressed her face to the ground and gently moaned. I could already feel her legs trembling and her pussy twitching. That's what lust will do to you - it bends time and space and reality.

"Oh Paul. Baby. You feel sooo good inside me.", she moaned softly.

Suddenly and without warning, we heard loud voices coming towards us. We froze in shock! I realized that we were less than 10 feet from a hiking trail. A gaggle, of what sounded like, 20 or more adults, were approaching us, quickly along that path, and we had no time to hide. We heard their voices and laughter getting louder and louder and Lynn and I looked at each other in embarrassed and humiliated panic and fear. Crouched as we were on that forest floor, the only thing blocking the hikers' view of us (besides the birch and pine trees lining the trail) , were a smattering of large, three foot tall, green ferns. They would surely see us. This was going to be bad. My cock was still throbbing deep inside her when I whispered into Lynn's ear.

"Don't move. Don't move a muscle or make any sound. They won't see us."

I lied to her - they would see us. I hugged and squeezed her and my arms wrapped around her breasts in an effort to make ourselves smaller. I leaned my head against the silky smooth skin of her back. She, ' pretended ' to help as well, as she pushed her ass back into my groin and ground it from side to side and up and down, and in a circular motion, mashing her pussy into me, with all her skill. My eyes rolled back into my head. I was so close to coming as my cock twitched inside her. Perhaps Lynn didn't understand what I had said. I whispered to her again, but this time, I used an angry assertive tone while I commanded her, not to move a muscle! She had never listened to my commands before and I should have known she wouldn't listen then. I slowly lifted my head and peered through the ferns to see the hikers quickly approaching us, two by two and three by three. 'Oh gosh!' I thought... 'Here we go. ..'.

It was at that moment, that Lynn chose to push us both, to the very edge of our sexually aroused limits. With the toned wet muscled walls of her hot vagina , she expertly gave my engorged penis, seven or eight , hard, tight, squeezes - as it lay there, buried helpless, throbbing and trapped inside her. I lost count of how many times my penis twitched in response - was it six or seven, or a dozen? I do recall seeing stars and my brain tingled. I tightly closed my eyes, and winced in pleasure , as I felt the waves of sexual bliss , roll over me. The hikers were right next to us, but in my 'sexually hyper-sensitive ' state of mind, I really. . . did not give. . . a shit ! I could see their feet - and some wore hiking boots. And of course, just at that moment , my silly cock twitched three more times. It was the tipping point for Lynn as she frantically whipped her hand across her mouth, and muffled first one moan and then another. Just for added payback, I gently caressed and massaged her swollen clit. Lynn instantly grabbed my hand in hers and froze it there, while she dug her nails into my wrist. My cock throbbed and I felt Lynn's pussy twitching repeatedly. We had just edged ourselves to the brink of orgasmic nirvana - and we paused there - hovering, almost floating. All the while, the hikers walked by us - totally oblivious to the carnal explicitness available for their viewing pleasure , just feet away.

Finally the last of the jolly trudgers had trudged by, as we heard their laughter echoing further and further into the distance, and far into the trees. My breathing resumed and Lynn exhaled loudly as her body went limp. Lynn looked back up at me with her twinkling blue green eyes, and smiled.

"Ooooops.", was all she said, and she started giggling.

I held her waist, and looked down at her and blinked. I suddenly noticed that there was a large mosquito resting on her bum. I slapped it hard - really hard , with my open hand. Lynn was startled and let out a loud yelp!

A squirrel in the branches of the tree right next to us began chirping. I presumed he wanted the 'show' to continue. . . and so did I !

©August 2018 Paul P.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
This story was submitted to A F F Virtual Symposium Topic - Hot August # 43

Have you ever been so aroused that you didn't care if you were caught by anyone or not?
Have you ever been caught by strangers or family , like Lynn and I almost were? Share your stories... please.

Oh and here's a safety tip... You're never truly alone in a forest. There's always at least one squirrel, ready and waiting to perv you... Lol

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Caught Naked By The Shore
Posted:Jul 16, 2018 5:24 am
Last Updated:Sep 15, 2018 7:38 pm
On that hot, steamy and sultry July evening, I sat there in my red, fold out picnic chair, (with the dual cup holders) and looked over the lake, as tiny sail boats dotted the horizon. Waves gently lapped up against the rocky shore.

Happy hour had (theoretically) ended, yet I still had a surplus of frozen Jello-vodka slushies packed in the cooler next to m e . The gentle, warm and yet cooling breeze, blowing in from the bay, could easily have hypnotised your soul, if you let it - so I let it... Or was it the Jello slushies? I wasn't sure.

A short distance away, the bell in the tower at the nearby church tolled eight times. It's soothing chimes echoed accross the shimmering water and then through the shaded park where I sat. The participants from the yoga class on the grass nearby , clapped their hands in approval and recognition for the diligent guru who had been leading them, and they all began rolling up their mats.

It was only appropriate, while in my 'Jello haze', that I asked myself the most relevant question I could think of at that moment ; How has that site (AdultFriendFinder), changed my sexual outlook? It was an interesting question. I took another sip of my Jello-vodka slushy, fired up the cell phone and logged onto the A F F site - for inspiration.

I flipped through some naked pictures of women and couples and then I 'clicked', on my own 'Profile', to (shamelessly), see what the viewer count was on my Album titled - 'Dick Pics For the Curious'.

Unbeknownst to me, two women (slightly younger than I was) , had paused to admire the lake. However, they chose to stand right behind me - as I sat there, in my chair, with my brilliant cell phone, lighting up the early dusk sky, with pictures of my dick! It was true, that I was hogging four feet of the view of the lake, on that strip of the shore. However, there were another five hundred yards of shoreline, where they might have chosen to pause.

At first I didn't even notice them and I can only imagine for how long they had stood there . It was only when I heard one of them make a comment to her friend about my pictures, that I turned around. They both looked at me and then with broad and bright smiles, feigned shock, and horror, all the while giggling between themselves. It seemed to me that they had been enjoying 'Happy Hour', somewhere else, prior to their lake visit.

"We didn't mean to look, but...", the shorter brunette started to say, still smiling.
"Are those pictures of you?", she continued, while grinning and quite obviously impressed.

"I don't think they're appropriate for i n s t a Gram though.", the taller blond woman chirped, and they both started laughing together.

Prior to my joining this site, I might have been horrified, mortified, or even embarrassed and shy. On that evening with those two women standing next to me, staring at my phone... I started to get a little 'chubby' .

Yes - one thing this site has proven to me is that some women, have the same desires and needs as men. And if you are patient and confident and have a great sense of humour and are marginally articulate - meeting new women and enjoying their warmth and company is a challenge that one can playfully and successfully face.

I had a cooler, full of Jello-vodka slushies and the sun wasn't setting for another hour. I greeted the two women and quickly ran to get two more lawn chairs out of the trunk of my car. I'd just made two new friends.

I'll let you know how this whole thing went down, another time. Yep... What was the question?

©July 2018 Paul P.

This story was submitted to the -
AdultFriendFinder Virtual Symposium #42
How Has This Site Changed My Sexual Outlook?

So I ask you - Has this site changed your sexual outlook and how? Let me know.

Mama's Boy ! ... (based on what she told me)
Posted:Jul 2, 2018 1:21 pm
Last Updated:Sep 15, 2018 8:03 pm
Bobby, held his girlfriend's waist and slowly opened the door to his dark, silent home. Bobby was a tall, good looking 35 man. He was intelligent and had a great job as a Security Guard at the local mall. Looking at him, you would never know that he was born without 8 of his fingers. He was also missing a large portion of his tongue. Birth defects to be sure - but challenges that Bobby faced - head on.

And yet, he lived with his doting mother, who did everything for him. She washed his clothes for him and cooked for him and cut his food up into little pieces for him and tied his shoes for him - sometimes . In fact, she often, did things for him, that he was perfectly capable of doing for himself. Yet, he always let his mother help him, whenever she wanted to. Bobby was a grown man, but he had some issues - that he was working through. Bobby and his girlfriend, walked into the dimly lit living room. There was no sign of his mother. She must be asleep, they both thought. The coast was clear.

Bobby's girlfriend, Deborah was a beautiful, slim and sultry twenty nine brunette, who had been waiting for this moment for months now. She knew they were heading upstairs to Bobby's bedroom and she was trembling with anticipation. Slowly, they tiptoed up the creeky stairs.

Bobby led Deborah into his dark bedroom and commanded her to take her clothes off and lie on his bed. She did as she was told. Bobby bundled up her clothes, sniffed her panties, and put everything into a neat pile on an empty chair next to the dresser. He blindfold Deborah with a silk scarf , and then, took off his own clothes. The bed creaked as he lay down beside her. They could both feel the heat of each other's bodies, as skin touched skin. They were both ready. He was as hard as he could be, and she was already moist and her pussy was throbbing.

Blindfolded and naked, she spread her legs and waited impatiently on the bed, in the dark. The only sound she heard, was her own heart beating and their breathing, as they inhaled, then exhaled each other's scent.

"Bobby! Pleasure me with your hands. Touch me ", she finally pleaded.

The bed rustled and squeaked and she soon felt a pair of warm, soft, palms , gently massaging her breasts and body and thighs until her nipples were erect and her vagina began tingling. Her dripping, hot juices, flowed in tiny, tiny rivlets down along and out of her pussy and into the crack of her bum.

"Oh Bobby. Touch me with your thumbs !", Deborah sighed and moaned softly.

The bed squeaked and rustled again, and she immediately felt a plump digit gently enter her wet vagina. She felt that familiar inexorable tingling as her engorged clitoris was expertly and deftly played with and stroked and teased until stars, filled her covered eyes and her knees began to twitch.

"Oh Bobby!"

She moaned again, as she arched her hips and tilted and rolled her head back, deeply into the soft pillow. Her pussy and her spine and her whole body and every part of her skin, tingled.

She would be unable to withstand this unbearable and heavenly much longer. Her mind and body were in ecstacy, and on fire and her loins and wet throbbing vagina ached for that familiar release - only a convulsing, mind numbing orgasm could provide.

"Oh Bobby. Baby... please, please! Use your mouth. Please make me cum!", she begged, as her toes curled and uncurled and her legs and knees shivered and quivered.

The bed rustled and creaked again as Bobby shifted next to her. Suddenly - she heard the unfamiliar and thundering voice of what could only be, Bobby's mother, bellowing, right, beside her.

"Bobby... move over, damm it! I can't REACH her from HERE !"

©July 2018 Paul P.
Have you ever dated a Mama's Boy?
Do you help your kids out or do you let them work things out for themselves ?

Your comments are most welcome...


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