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Cock Tales 1/2/2007
Sheila was laying on the sofa with a cool damp cloth covering
her eyes when the phone rang. It was her friend, Jim, calling
to see how her afternoon was going. "Hey Baby, How
are you?", he shouted. Jim always shouted. He was
bouncy and exuberant and was the perfect person to sell
real estate to wealthy yuppies, which is what he did during
the day. At night, he sang three times a week with a ...
4 Comments, 436 Views,
18 Votes
,5.44 Score |
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What guys think 12/22/2006
I keep seeing this post flying around about all the nice
guys left in the world. The post seems sweet and all. Sounds
like there are some girls out there who seem to really appreciate
the nice guys of the world…but C'MON!!!
Most of these thought aren't even finished…
Now don't go thinking I am Jaded or anything…I prefer
to think of it as I am a realist. Reality is, ...
0 Comments, 74 Views,
0 Votes
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what it do 12/19/2006
hay i can say im a pretty nice girl, i havent meet any for-real
people on here.im just lookin to hook up with a few bad bitchz, an
some big dick men, that know how to put it down on a horny
ass black girl.is that really 2 much 2 ask 4??aint tis what
this place is 4.
1 Comments, 132 Views,
10 Votes
,3.98 Score |
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Men and Fragrances 12/17/2006
What's up with men being obsessed with fruity type
fragrances on a woman. I know that like to keep a nice size
collection of body oils and sprays. My regular oils, my
man doesn't notice most of them except for maybe a couple,
but all the ones that smell sort of "fruity"
or "citrusy", almost as soon as I walk in a room,
he gets a whiff and wants to instantly "jump my bones"!
That is so ...
0 Comments, 57 Views,
4 Votes
,3.25 Score |
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In the rain 12/7/2006
I few years ago I had a girl friend that her favorite place
to have sex was in the rain. She loved the rain. After we were
done she would run around naked in it and get off again. Has
anyone else experienced this?
0 Comments, 68 Views,
2 Votes
,4.50 Score |
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When a guy misses you... 11/30/2006
When a guy calls u
he wants to be with you
When a guy is quiet,
He's listening to you...
When a guy is not arguing,
He realizes he's wrong
When a guy says, "I'm fine, " after a few
minutes,
he means it
When a guy stares at you,
he wishes you would care about him and
wonders
if you do?
...
1 Comments, 96 Views,
10 Votes
,3.58 Score |
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Complete Off!!! 11/19/2006
Ever had one of those relationships that seems like you
couldnt be anymore apart from eachother, but personality
wise or appearance wise your linked in a way you cant really
describe?
Ive seen so many people that I have attractions with that
dont seem to fit the bill so to speak and its starting to get
weird... Normally I like people that are generally tall,
creative, and ...
0 Comments, 46 Views,
3 Votes
,0.98 Score |
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Found in the Classified Ads... 10/29/2006
Recently found in the Classified ads:
Post Date: Aug 7th, 2006
Expire Date: Sept 6th, 2006
Asking Price: $10, 000
Comments/Description:
06' Suzuki GSXR 1000 - This bike is perfect! It has 1000
miles and has had its 500 mile dealer service. (Expensive)
It's been adult ridden, all wheels have always been
on the ground. I use it as a cruiser/commuter. ...
2 Comments, 200 Views,
10 Votes
,4.58 Score |
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women.. 10/26/2006
guys...
hit it..
what level of age of women do you guys love to have sex with?
1 Comments, 96 Views,
5 Votes
,2.49 Score |
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"First Time Sex" with "First Wife" 10/21/2006
This happened when I was dating my first wife. In Beaumont,
Tx back in the sixties (before and after) people would go
"parking" in the boonies. The boonies were
secluded areas off some of the country roads where oil drilling
had been done and a wellhead was put in place. There were
ideal places to be "alone" because they were
a graveled cul-du-sac so you could turn around and didn't
get ...
1 Comments, 254 Views,
10 Votes
,5.18 Score |
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When a girl misses you... 10/20/2006
When you break a girls heart,
she still feels it when
you run into eachother 3 years later
When a girl is quiet,
millions of things are running through her
mind.
When a girl is not arguing,
she is thinking deeply.
When a girl looks at you with eyes full of
questions,
she ...
0 Comments, 90 Views,
6 Votes
,5.07 Score |
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Ten commandments( of marriage) 10/18/2006
The Ten Commandments of Marriage
Commandment 1.
Marriages are made in heaven. But then again, so is thunder
and lightning.
Commandment 2.
If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention
to every word you say, talk in your sleep.
Commandment 3.
Marriage is grand -- and divorce is at least 100 ...
1 Comments, 251 Views,
13 Votes
,5.16 Score |
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First date 10/8/2006
How I Entertain a New Date:
I had a date the other night at my place. On the phone
the day before, the girl asked me to "Cook her
something she's never had before" for dinner.
After
many minutes of scratching my head over what to make,
I finally settled on something she has DEFINITELY
never eaten. I got out my trusty case of MRE's (Meal,
Ready-to-Eat). Field rations that ...
2 Comments, 131 Views,
12 Votes
,3.15 Score |
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So,... Has It Comes To This... 10/8/2006
Personal Ads - Interpreted
<br>
WOMEN'S ADS
<br>
40-ish................ 49
Adventurer.............Slept with all your friends
Athletic.............. No tits
Average looking........Has a face like a basset hound
Beautiful............. Pathological liar
Contagious Smile.......Does a lot of Ecstasy
Educated.............. Banged her Political Science
professor
...
1 Comments, 415 Views,
33 Votes
,5.99 Score |
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the in law's thanks 10/8/2006
A married couple was in a terrible accident where the woman's
face was severely burned.
The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft
any skin from her body because she was too skinny.
So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin. However,
the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable
would have to come from his buttocks. The husband ...
2 Comments, 356 Views,
17 Votes
,5.53 Score |
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On Fire 10/7/2006
There was this guy that I would occasionally hook up with.
One evening he asked me to come to his house for a lil fun.
He asked me to wear a black skirt with no panties. Of course,
I agreed. Now it was the middle of winter and freezing cold.
After sometime I arrived at his house freezing, and told
him that it probably would take a crow bar to pry my legs open.
He stood me in front of ...
1 Comments, 63 Views,
40 Votes
,7.23 Score |
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The Things That Make Me Feel Good 10/1/2006
1.Falling/Being in love.
2.Laughing so hard your face hurts.
3.A hot shower.
4.No lines at the supermarket.
5.A special glance.
6.Getting mail.
7.Taking a drive on a pretty road.
8.Hearing your favourite song on the radio.
9.Lying in bed listening to the rain outside.
10.Hot towels fresh out of the dryer.
11.Chocolate milkshake... (or vanilla... or strawberry!)
12.A bubble ...
1 Comments, 76 Views,
6 Votes
,4.22 Score |
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SuperMan 8/18/2006
women should understand that man need love beside sex....
can't be your Superman who give afuck only
bitches, they come they go....love stays onlyyy
0 Comments, 106 Views,
5 Votes
,2.49 Score |
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A joke 8/11/2006
What combination of three two letter words means small?
"Is it in"
0 Comments, 707 Views,
14 Votes
,4.10 Score |
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My truck got some action 8/7/2006
I walked to the grocery store yesterday hoping to stretch
my legs instead of driving there. I come back about 3 hours
later to find that my next-door neighbor is sitting in my
truck, inside my garage, with the gear shifter up her pussy.
I almost died fucking laughing at that point, except that
she then bent over and asked for it up the ass... what a great
day.
0 Comments, 178 Views,
5 Votes
,4.12 Score |
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GIMME BACK MY CHI!!! 8/3/2006
C stayed with me last night. He got up early as usual to head
off to work. I never felt him get out of bed, so I looked at
him funny when he came to kiss me goodbye trying to figure
out why he was dressed. I got out of bed about an hour after
he left, went online for a few hours to sort out files, cleaned
up just a little (didn't have to much motivation in
this department today) and then ...
2 Comments, 347 Views,
19 Votes
,2.20 Score |
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I want a girl who ... 7/23/2006
I want a girl who doesn’t know the meaning of the word quit,
but does know the meaning of most other words.
I want a woman who understands spontaneous passion, can
thrill to dizzy sudden sex (while keeping her balance),
and who understands that we probably would not be allowed
to shop at that grocery store ever again. (“Mommy, why is
that woman snorting like a rhino?” ...
2 Comments, 376 Views,
5 Votes
,3.80 Score |
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penis size 7/22/2006
This is the age old question about which matters more...size
or use? which do y'all think is more true? Does a bigger
penis automatically mean better sex? or does it all depend
on "attack" style?
9 Comments, 713 Views,
19 Votes
,2.99 Score |
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PARTYTIME 7/6/2006
I thought for my first party i'd get an even number of
both sexes together with your own thoughts and fettishes,
as well as sexual needs. The erotic side of it is that there
could be a lot of people who are meeting for the first time,
or there could be small groups of people turning up together.So
on the 10th of June, (a saturday) we will have this get together
and see what happens. I now ...
0 Comments, 72 Views,
0 Votes
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WHEN WE GIRLS DRINK TOO MUCH............ 6/8/2006
WHEN WE GIRLS DRINK TOO MUCH............
<br>
1. WE HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHERE OUR PURSE OR CELL PHONE
IS.
<br>
2. WE BELIEVE THAT DANCING WITH OUR ARMS OVERHEAD AND WIGGLING
OUR BUTT WHILE YELLING "WOO-HOO!" IS TRULY
THE SEXIEST DANCE MOVE AROUND.
<br>
3. WE'VE SUDDENLY DECIDED THAT WE WANT TO KICK SOMEONE'S
ASS AND HONESTLY BELIEVE WE COULD DO IT TOO.
...
4 Comments, 536 Views,
31 Votes
,6.50 Score |
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I Am Hung 6/5/2006
One Saturday afternoon, I was sitting in my lawn chair,
drinking beer and watching my woman mow the lawn.
The neighbor lady from across the street was so outraged
at this that she came over and shouted at me, "You should
be hung."
I calmly replied, "I am.
That’s why she cuts the grass".
3 Comments, 626 Views,
29 Votes
,4.64 Score |
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sexual fantasies of women 5/31/2006
It shouldn't be surprising that women have fantasies
too. Sometimes, they are more sexual than ours. In this
article we will discuss the top ten fantasies that women
have. You will want to print this one out for future reference.
Here we go, please pay attention!
Having sex with strangers: This might sound odd, but women
fantasize about this as well. Having sex with a complete ...
1 Comments, 462 Views,
11 Votes
,3.35 Score |
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My girlfriend's sister 5/29/2006
Someone told me this story and I want to share with you. This
guy is a friend of a friend of mine.
I was engaged and have already planned a marriage with my
girlfriend. Her family seems to welcome me, especially
her younger sister. When my girlfriend is not looking,
she always come close to me, hug me and rub her breast against
my arm. I thought she was just kidding but I ...
1 Comments, 688 Views,
29 Votes
,6.75 Score |
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REMEMBER TO TAKE IT OFF!!! 5/20/2006
My friend & I met these two guys from out of town, they
were only here for a short time building
a house.
We went to dinner, then to a local bar for drinks and dancing.
There wasn't a whole lot of dancing
going on, but there was groping under the table.
We drove back to their motel and my friend, with her date,
went upstairs. I stayed in the car
with my date for a while talking ...
1 Comments, 487 Views,
119 Votes
,7.09 Score |
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Cyber Sex Conversation 5/19/2006
Online computer users often engage in what is affectionately
known as
"cybersex". Often the fantasies typed into
keyboards and shared through Internet phone lines get
pretty raunchy. However, as you'll see below, one
of the two cyber-surfers in the following transcript of
an online chat doesn't seem to quite get the point of
cyber sex. Then again, maybe he does...
<br>
...
0 Comments, 642 Views,
53 Votes
,8.97 Score |